bliss. pure bliss.

nothing is better than having your phone go buzzzzz, buzzzzz, and seeing the name of that boy appear across the screen. at least that's what i thought. i was completely wrong. there is something better. when you read the text and it says. "I'm in logan!!!!!!"

that ladies and gentleman, has put me in the best, giddy, blissful mood i've been in, in a very long time. 

maybe someday i'll catch a break.

it's good to know this is my life even here in logan.

this is my life almost to a t. i unfortunately haven't found an austin yet. so in the meantime, i'm stuck with guys like poor terry here, that don't know when to take a hint. and delight in stalking me. i guess it's whatever. and hopefully my austin is out there somewhere.

the avatar.

i'm sorry i've been a rant and rave type person the last couple posts. i'm just a little sleep deprived is all. but on a happier note... i have watched a season and a half of avatar the last air bender. because i've felt to sick (thanks to auntie flow) to do much else. and hey avatar makes me happy. i love it. and everyone else should too. 

the water faucet kind of movie.

Have you ever had a day where all you need is a bowl of ice cream, and a movie that makes you cry? Just so you can get it out, so you can feel better? today's a day like that. all i want is a bowl of my favorite blue bunny wedding cake ice cream. and to watch titanic. unfortunately.. i'm movieless. and ice creamless. 

a sense of belonging.

lately i've lacked feeling of belonging. anywhere. not even at home.
let me explain.
at home, i'm rarely there. my room is no longer going to belong to me at the end of the summer after i officially move out. and i've come to notice that my family is moving forward with their lives without a bat of an eyelash, or a thought about me going away, or being gone. home the way i know it. isn't how i know it. it's how i knew it.
living in logan, staying at my aunts house as been great. and i'm so grateful they have takin me in. but. i'm having a hard time being a guest. i'm longing to feel comfortable. to be able to walk around in my underwear in the mornings, because i can.
friends? i miss my friends terribly. in fact more than i thought i ever would. i hate having no one to talk to. i'm longing to do something with someone over the age of ten. i spend way to much time by myself. and my cousin my age has been kind enough to invite me to do stuff with him and his friends. but, i hate being the awkward third wheel. i want my best friends at home. the ones i'm comfortable with. the ones who know i'm crazy. and love to have fun.

today it's hard to grow up. and it's hard to cope with change. it's overwhelming me. overwhelming to the point where i just cry.

i guess that's just a part of growing up. 

gone trekin.

for something i entirely loathed four years ago, and refused to never do again. i was astonished at how much fun i had on trek. in fact it might be my second favorite thing i've done this summer.

i especially loved my family. they were amazing and we had a blast together. our experiences on trek consisted of..sitting on a school bus for 6 hours.. and we walked...and walked...and waited...and walked...and walked...and walked...and waited...and walked...and walked...and hydrated...maybe urinated (had to GO)...and walked...and walked...and walked...and pushed...BAGER HOLE!!! and pulled...and walked...and walked...and got rabies...and walked...and walked... and walked...and slept??? and walked...and walked... and walked... and blistered...and walked...and bled... and laughed...and cried...and walked... and screamed...and walked... and tents collapsed...and walked...and "iv"ed... and walked... and walked...and got wet...and walked... and ate...and walked... and got dehydrated...and "half-wayed"...and walked... and walked... and walked... and star tripped...and walked... at least we're not dead... yet. 

i love you anderson family! and our adventures (: thanks for helping me see that i can do hard things. and that i also don't have to do hard things alone.

small town.

This weekend has been one of the funnest weekends I've had all summer. I found I really love my job, and the people I work with. (especially jake. he's attractive). I also found that small towns maybe aren't as bad as I thought they were. 

Up in Cache Valley there is a tiny little town called Mendon. To get there you have to drive past the dump, and the swamps. But it's a pretty little town, and I mean gorgeous. the landscape is lovely. This little town called Mendon happens to be where my father grew up. I know your asking why would I care? And you probably don't. But, I've had the opportunity to be living up in Mendon at my uncle's house. It's been a blast. Especially this weekend. Because it was the annual Mendon Pioneer Day Celebration. And I should be completely honest. I usually hate dumb celebrations like this. But this celebration made an exception to the rule. I spent the day hanging out with my Dad's two brothers sand their families. And not to mention being dragged all over the place so Andy could introduce me to people. That wasn't much of an introduction. because he'd just ask people. "Do you know who this is?" "This is Mark's daughter." and then people would start in on stories about my dad. and saying i knew you when you were just this big. and they'd put there hand down in measurement of about the height of a three year old. and then they'd say, tell your dad hello. just about everyone in that town told me to say hi to dad. haha. I even met my dad's two best friends growing up. weird. anyway, I really am getting to the good part. My cousin who's my age finally took pity on me, and rescued me from the adults. He was kind enough to let me hang out with all his friends. Which I'm not going to lie was terribly awkward at first. Because they all knew each other. and I only know my cousin. so I was unfortunately the odd one out. but as the night wore on, I got talking to his one friend a lot. And after the fireworks he asked me for my number. yes (: a boy asked me for my number. total movie moment. I'm excited. I have at least one friend up there! and he's a cute boy! What more could a girl ask for?

I guess what I'm getting at is, I'm really enjoying living in Cache Valley. And i'm not so worried about making friends anymore.