annoyed

i'm annoyed with people. so i'm sorry if i've been a brat to you recently. i just need to let go of some things. because i'm quite sick of being annoyed.

t.g.i.f.

after the longest week of my life. conference weekend will be very much enjoyed. enough said.

not very well thought through.

a little help here... i don't know how to talk to boys (especially this boy.. and well that's a problem....)

i'm a teenage girl. sometimes i don't do the smartest things. and my plans aren't always well thought through. and even when they are.. they usually don't turn out how they were supposed to anyway.. is it's almost like a no win situation. i wish life could just be like the movies. but nope. my life is just one big awkward embarrassing moment.

yeah if you haven't caught on. i did something last night. that i thought would be great. i doorbell ditched a pie on my guy friends porch. because well.. lately (the past year) we've been awkward friends. and we can't seem to get passed that. and me in my little mind decide hey this will be fun. and it will make it not be so awkward anymore.

yeah now it's more awkward.

good one bre.

why can't i ever do anything right when i'm around this guy?
i always mess up. say the wrong thing. and he always catches me doing the weirdest things.

cat got your tongue?

why is it that whenever i'm around you i'm at a loss for words? even though there are so many things i want to say. i just can't put them in words. you intimidate me. even though you really shouldn't. i'm more self conscious about myself when i'm with you. help me out here. cause all i WANT is to be your friend.

awkward

i'm babysitting my cousins right. and a neighbor hood kid comes over to talk to will. and then he notices me playing with eli. he then asks me. "is this your baby?" i answer "umm no he's my cousin" then he says as a mater of fact "ohh that makes sense cause i was wondering how a white person would have a black baby... how do white people have black babies...?" umm what am i supposed to say to this kid?? hahaa so i just told him my cousin was adopted. and then he says "ohh i see like from an orphanage.." yeah sure kid anything to get you to stop asking me awkward questions.. hahaa

and don't even worry this kid would not leave us alone. (will did not like this kid. he told him to stop following us about 50 times... hahaa seeing five year old boys argue is pretty priceless..)

it's tuesday

- sister turned off my alarm.
- trying to stay awake in seminary
- coloring muscle diagrams in animal science
- reading a million essays in ap english
-lunch duty for spirit team
- creep kid flirting with me while on lunch duty
- jealousy over boys
- weird kids at school
- peer tutoring
- seeing man with a snake around his neck. (i almost had an aneurism)
- seeing him and getting butterflies.
- seeing the other him and getting butterflies.
- thinking to myself i like too many boys at the same time.
- chores
-homework
-babysitting

my people

 these girls are my people. we are crazy and spontaneous. enough said.

quilting retreat...? with old ladies....?

yes my friends. i go on quilting retreats. where i am the only one who is still young. the rest range from my aunt's and moms age to really old woman. (although this year mckinnah will be joining me.. so we can both be the young folk.) you all might be laughing about now. saying to yourself. is this girl for real? and i'm here to say I AM FOR REAL!!! i love quilting retreat. not only do i get to go and quilt non-stop for an entire weekend. i get to hang out with grandma, mother, sarah, heather, and this year mckinnnah. what more could a girl ask for? plus also.. it's great to go to these things.. because the old woman just build your self esteem right up. i LOVE these ladies. now november just needs to get here. (:

blast from the past

i spent two hours with my mother today. looking at all her old pictures. had a few great laughs. discovered that my dad had a creeper mustache. also that my grandma was gorgeous! and people still make the same faces now that they did way back then. plus we found that certain people look like people. like zebbie looks like sarah. but there were some that sarah looked like her kids. and hannah looks like heather. but anyway.. all i'm saying is... one day i'm going to have a 17 year old. and they will look at all my pictures. and laugh and make fun. and that's mind boggling to think about..

very smitten.

yeah i'm still swooning. not a big deal. except it kind of is. really is.

last friday night

listen to this song.

sometimes... tori and i jam out to this song in the parking lot of maceys. no worries. 

smitten...? possibly

so maybe you awkwardly held my hand.
and maybe i kinda liked it.

changes

i needed a change in my life.
so i changed my blog.
hahaa


plus also.
i love my mother (:
we sometimes fight about what to say to boys i'm texting.
she's trying to get this guy to take me to the football game. it's not gonna happen.
hahaa!
she told me if i didn't answer the boy in five minutes. she wouldn't get me a costa vida salad.
BLACK MAIL!!!
hahaa
ohhhh boys (: gotta love them!

t.o.m.

t.o.m.

time. of. month.

i hate this time of the month. a lot.
wanna know why?
i get so tired. i can barely keep my eyes open.
i am an emotional wreck. honestly the weirdest things will just set me off.
my body hurts. everywhere.
cramps. you are of the devil.
ohh and making three or four trips to the bathroom. before lunch.
i don't care about looking cute. so i look like crap.
also i break out.

enough said.

a thought

maybe it wasn't such a great idea to go for a run considering
a) i have an upset stomach
b) i ran harder than i usually do.. because i'm in one of those moods where i'm just frustrated at the world. (i hate these moods)
c) i have t.o.m issues for those of you who don't understand t.o.m (time. of. month.)
d) i'm used to running at 530 when it's cold. yeah it's 85 degrees outside. and so running that makes it about 100 degrees.


yeah all these factors ended in me..
a) dry heaving and nearly throwing up.
b) tears of pain and frustration
c) getting to my hill and seeing attractive baseball players outside. and forcing myself to sprint up the hill so they don't think i'm wimpy. even though a couple minutes previous i was close to throwing up.
d) running straight to the bathroom on arrival of my home. (i didn't vomit. but i almost wish i would have. cause you know how sometimes it almost just makes your tummy feel better just to get it out.)


i'm praying tomorrow is a better day.  



p.s.

this doesn't really help with my goal to be more positive and see the good in things. and be nice. and what not. i'll try to be better listeners. because i really know how old it gets to read those blogs that all it says is whiny, negative, my life stinks, boo hoo, sob story, junk. because if your life is so terrible. get off your butt and do something about it.

so imma do that. get off my butt. and go do some good in my life. okay.

dear boy,
i'd like to report that i'm over you.
but i'm not.
love, bre

a fresh frenzy

5:30 AM runs are the best thing that has ever happened in my life. (:

it makes my day go well. a lot more smooth.

i feel great.

it's worth the sacrifice of sleep. enough said.

ha especially when i go with annika. and we talk about boys. see creepers. and then find out there was a guy found dead at the library. so we freak out, cause we could have died!! hahaa

ohh and skipping assemblies is a great thing. i learned all sorts of stuff. hahaa like..
-osculate. means kissing. ohh but the real definition would be wrestling of the lips.
good times brayden and kylee. good times. hahaa
(i guess you had to be there...)

my ghostly ipod turning on in the middle of last period durning a test. nothing like hearing john mayers voice coming out of my backpack (: hahaa


and i'm going to mary poppins at the capitol theatre tonight with the fam. it's gonna be a party and a half times ten and i cannot wait!

all i'm saying is.

today is a good day. (:

truly a sight to behold

well folks. i will be attending homecoming in my aunt sarah's dress. don't even worry, the dress is as old as me. but i LOVE it (:

that is all (:

i'm swimming in it

i'm up to my eyeballs with stress. i don't know how much longer i'm going to be able to tread in it. and on top of that it's making me break out. this is not okay seeing that homecoming is saturday. i need to go find a stress ball.

back to reality

going back to school. not that great. having to deal with people you don't really like very much. lunch duty for spirit team (the beast lunch lady yelled at me the entire time.). dealing with boys that are either to good for you, or the ones that you wish would just leave you alone. a truck load of homework. getting school pictures back. (i wanted to puke). wearing my rain boots cause it was supposed to rain. (it didn't rain) 

on the bright side. the day is over. i vented to my friend on the way home over stupid boys who are just too cool for me. loser. you know who you are. and hey i was born into the deaf community today. got my name sign. ohh and i got to see friends. i sorta missed them a bit.

well here's to eight and a half more months of school.

yipee.... 

 

l.a.k.e. p.o.w.e.l.l.

                   

                  

                

                                 

lake powell (:
heaven on earth. enough said.

highlights from this trip..

- a boat full of attractive boys waved to me and said hi.. about four times.
- running out of gas on enzo.. kameo had to swim to the houseboat to fetch the jet ski and tow us in
- killing a rattle snake.
- toad hunting every night ( i am so proud of myself! i wasn't even scared to catch it! )
- letting a toad loose in the houseboat.. PRICELESS
- lewis and clark expedition up face canyon
- SURFING of course (:
- i got bit by a fish.. not a lie.. danny got bit by one too. i'm not making this up!
- got a nice tan.
- getting rained on in the middle of the night, soaking all our sleeping gear.
- attempting family pictures..
- eating way more food than any human should ever have to eat.
- making new friends
- riding a tube for the first time in like a year.. (epic fail)
- wearing my sexy orange life jacket. just cause i can (:

great trip (:
lake powell you are missed. see ya next year (:


ohh and i got asked to homecoming on this rainy night (: just thought you should all know (: woot woot! can't wait!

meet one of my greatest heroes.

she is one of the most amazing people i know. she taught me how to quilt. she has been there for me in when i've had to face some trials. she is kind and caring. she spoils me. she listens to all my stories. she calls me on the first day of school, just to ask how it went. she takes me on vacations. she rarely gets mad, even when i vomited up chocolate waffers down her entire hallway i dont remember her raising her voice. she is always giving me new books to read. and i love all the movies she tells me to watch. like thoroughly modern millie, the courts gesture, (okay i could have done without the family band.. and i have no idea why you like willow..) i love when we sit and talk for hours. i love when we go to the pioneer day parade just so i can get a pet memorial t-shirt, and you still give me a candy bag, even though i'm almost 18.   

we have so many good times together. 

she is one of my best friends.

this woman is my grandmother.

i love her so much. she is a great example to me. i aspire to be like her. 

i love you grandma. and now it's time for me to be there for you. 

we fight like sisters

coming out of the school parking lot today. shelby and i.. we got a little... well... agressive with our driving..

we came pretty darn close to this..

hahaa good times shelby (:

grinning from ear to ear

life is good.  i find myself just wanting to smile (:
 maybe you should smile too (: i hear it's contagious... (:


you heard me!

                                    s.m.i.l.e 

it will work you wonders!