gone trekin.

for something i entirely loathed four years ago, and refused to never do again. i was astonished at how much fun i had on trek. in fact it might be my second favorite thing i've done this summer.

i especially loved my family. they were amazing and we had a blast together. our experiences on trek consisted of..sitting on a school bus for 6 hours.. and we walked...and walked...and waited...and walked...and walked...and walked...and waited...and walked...and walked...and hydrated...maybe urinated (had to GO)...and walked...and walked...and walked...and pushed...BAGER HOLE!!! and pulled...and walked...and walked...and got rabies...and walked...and walked... and walked...and slept??? and walked...and walked... and walked... and blistered...and walked...and bled... and laughed...and cried...and walked... and screamed...and walked... and tents collapsed...and walked...and "iv"ed... and walked... and walked...and got wet...and walked... and ate...and walked... and got dehydrated...and "half-wayed"...and walked... and walked... and walked... and star tripped...and walked... at least we're not dead... yet. 

i love you anderson family! and our adventures (: thanks for helping me see that i can do hard things. and that i also don't have to do hard things alone.

small town.

This weekend has been one of the funnest weekends I've had all summer. I found I really love my job, and the people I work with. (especially jake. he's attractive). I also found that small towns maybe aren't as bad as I thought they were. 

Up in Cache Valley there is a tiny little town called Mendon. To get there you have to drive past the dump, and the swamps. But it's a pretty little town, and I mean gorgeous. the landscape is lovely. This little town called Mendon happens to be where my father grew up. I know your asking why would I care? And you probably don't. But, I've had the opportunity to be living up in Mendon at my uncle's house. It's been a blast. Especially this weekend. Because it was the annual Mendon Pioneer Day Celebration. And I should be completely honest. I usually hate dumb celebrations like this. But this celebration made an exception to the rule. I spent the day hanging out with my Dad's two brothers sand their families. And not to mention being dragged all over the place so Andy could introduce me to people. That wasn't much of an introduction. because he'd just ask people. "Do you know who this is?" "This is Mark's daughter." and then people would start in on stories about my dad. and saying i knew you when you were just this big. and they'd put there hand down in measurement of about the height of a three year old. and then they'd say, tell your dad hello. just about everyone in that town told me to say hi to dad. haha. I even met my dad's two best friends growing up. weird. anyway, I really am getting to the good part. My cousin who's my age finally took pity on me, and rescued me from the adults. He was kind enough to let me hang out with all his friends. Which I'm not going to lie was terribly awkward at first. Because they all knew each other. and I only know my cousin. so I was unfortunately the odd one out. but as the night wore on, I got talking to his one friend a lot. And after the fireworks he asked me for my number. yes (: a boy asked me for my number. total movie moment. I'm excited. I have at least one friend up there! and he's a cute boy! What more could a girl ask for?

I guess what I'm getting at is, I'm really enjoying living in Cache Valley. And i'm not so worried about making friends anymore. 

vent.

I'm itching to tell people my stories. But it's hard to when I get verbally attacked before I can even begin. Maybe I wasn't even gonna tell them all the details. I just wanted to tell them the funny part, about how I ended up getting locked out of my house. But you know, I guess it's whatever. I guess I can tell my journal, and my dog, and I guess my imaginary friend. Cause I personally think it's a great story.  And people need to lighten up, and not judge so quickly. Especially if they don't even really know the person. And maybe, just maybe. if they had let me tell the story. they'd have a different opinion about him. But I guess that's just an idea. 

missing you.

I've been wanting to have a summer fling since the summer after eighth grade, when I had my first fling ever. But that's not the summer I'd like to tell you about. In fact I try to sharpie out that summer in my poor brain. But the summer I'm talking about is the present. the now. like today. I wouldn't say I've had a fling. But I've fallen for a boy. I couldn't tell you if it's love. Because I'm not really sure what love is. (I'm only 18. I still have a life to figure that out. right?) But I'd like to think it's somewhere close to love. I'd like to think it's young love. Love that's not ready for commitment. But a love that has made us close friends, that keeps us finding our way back to each other. If that makes any sense at all. But here's the part where it all gets complicated. I'm in the process of moving 2 hours away. That leaves us weekends like the past weekend. When we went for a sunday drive. so we could catch up. we talked about life. and we laughed and had fun. And the way he kissed me goodbye made me swoon uncontrollably, it almost made me cry. Because it wasn't for certain when we would be able to see each other again. I'm going to miss him terribly.  I wanted to live in that moment forever. I wanted every night to end that way. But life has a different plan. And the plan is sending me off to logan. And keeping him here for a short couple of months until he leaves on his mission. I'm terrified. So many things can happen in two years. I try not to think about it. But on days like today it seems to consume me. It's hard going a week without seeing him. let alone two years. But i've also come to notice the time that separates us has made the time we are together more special. So maybe there's not a lot to worry about. right? I don't know I'm in a sticky situation. that has no right or wrong answers. and right now. All I can say is, I miss him terribly. And it's only been two days since I've seen him. 

for kicks. and some giggles.

they made me giggle. 

I shouldn't.

 I shouldn't be upset that my room is shortly going to belong to my sister.  I shouldn't be wanting to cut off all my hair. I shouldn't be checking my phone as often as I do hoping I have a text from that boy I've been missing, and I shouldn't feel let down when there's not. I shouldn't spend so much time on the computer. I shouldn't take things I have for granted. I shouldn't be so hard on myself. I shouldn't care what others think. I shouldn't stay up so late.

I promise to do better. I really do. 

homeward bound.

I'm coming home for the weekend! I'm really excited. Possibly even a little to excited. I can't wait to see  my family and friends. I guess what I'm really getting at is, Cheers to the Weekend!!!